I am thankful the kids are on Spring Break because we do not have to get up and moving so quickly and early. I need that extra time in bed to lay prone and gather my strength. When Lucas finally wakes up I begin to move. I do my little roll to get out of bed. First stop is the bathroom with Lucas sitting by me and I do a quick diaper change with him standing up. After washing my hands I yell up to Gabriel's room, "Come downstairs for breakfast!" He replies "I'm not ready yet!" Okay to this I laugh quietly and tell him "Ten minutes okay?" He replies "That's all I need to finish this battle!" I love that he still has his great sense of imagination! He likes to play Yu Gi Oh! and all those other types of card games.
Downstairs I stand in my kitchen and contemplate the time. On the way down the stairs I couldn't help but notice the total disarray of the living room, toys everywhere, blankets and pillows cast around the floor, sticky surfaces and the floor needs a good vacuuming (it actually needs a deep shampooing but let's not get that picky). As I walk into the dinning room I see the table is piled up again, we still have birthday decorations up and the coat rack is heavy with our winter coats. I estimate it would take me an hour to fully clean the dinning room the way it should be done but if Leo did it he probably could get it done in 15 minutes flat. I sigh and move into the kitchen. This is where I cringe. Yesterday I halfway stacked the dishwasher but never finished it. I made spaghetti and meatballs for dinner last night so the pots and pans await me on the stove, the stove itself needs a good scrubbing to clean up the splatter. Now here I stand. Three rooms need a deep cleaning. I have only been out of bed for 15 minutes. My body aches. I cannot possibly do anything productive yet. I stare at my medicine cabinet. I pull out a fresh Fentanyl patch (yesterday's fell off a day early after my shower) and I count out the days on my calendar. Each Fentanyl patch lasts 72 hours, that's 3 days. I put this one on now at 8:30am Wednesday it will last me till Saturday morning. This is my last patch in the box, a new prescription is being mailed out to my pharmacy. I put this patch on with confidence that I will have my new prescription before the weekend, I will need my medication to get me through Easter weekend.
Judging my body I know this patch will not be enough to get my body feeling well enough to plow through my chores today. I take a percocet to help give me a boost. Repeating to myself 8:30, 8:30, 8:30 so I won't forget what time I took my meds. With short term memory issues I have found this is the best method to remember what time I took a percocet, just in case I find myself hurting later and needing anothter percocet to help me get through. A percocet lasts 4-6 hours.
Then I start the process of breakfast for the boys. I think to myself 'Most Mom's consider taking care of themselves first as getting dressed and beautified but for me taking care of myself first means making sure I am medicated.' I turn a blind eye to the mess and focus first on feeding everyone. The pets come first or else they will just be annoying. "Gabe, can you help me feed the cat and dog?" My personal super hero comes running. "I will feed Cleo and you can feed Pharaoh." he tells me. I am good with that since Gabe hates touching the canned dog food, it makes him gag. After the pets are taken care of I move on to the boys breakfast; I put the tea pot on to boil for Lucas' oatmeal and I put a toaster waffle into the toaster for Gabe. I then start the coffee, besides a great wake me up it also helps boost my medications helping them to work a little faster, love that caffeine! I pull out a tall glass for Gabe my milk kid and a superman cup for Lucas to have his dilluted apple juice. I grab a coffee cup and add my purevia then set it aside till I am finished with the boys breakfasts. I have about another minute till everything is ready so I start working the kitchen. I grab last nights dinner plates and scrape them into the garbage, set them into the sink to soak. Gabriel's toaster waffle pops up first so I grap a paper towel, a knife, and peanut butter. I take him his breakfast. Next up is Lucas and his oatmeal. After fixing my coffee I sit down at the computer and I begin typing this post. While I am typing I am gratified with watching my boys play on the floor together. Even though Gabriel never liked Thomas the Train he will sit on the floor and help build the train tracks. Gabe knows all the trains names and does his best to understand what Lucas' wants.
Yes how my body feels this morning sucks and I still need to find the energy to accomplish my chores. Just looking at everything that needs to be done is exhausting. If I cannot get to it all today that means tomorrow's chores will be backed up too. The only reason I am pushing so hard this week is that I WANT a perfectly clean house for Easter Sunday. When I take pictures of the boys and their baskets or the boys looking for the hidden Easter eggs I want to be proud of how my house looks in the pictures. Next week, when Lucas starts his new Pre-School program I will be able to rest.
In the time it took me to write this post, taking a few minutes here and there to talk with my boys and fix a second cup of coffee and a peice of toast, my medications have begun to take affect, relaxing the muscles in my back and easing the pain. I plan to finish my coffee, get dressed and then tackle the kitchen.
Today's agenda! Clean the downstairs. Get the boys out of the house; maybe a walk around the block with the dog. Take Lucas to his 3 year old check up. Fix something for dinner tonight. To me this list already sounds exhausting. I pray that I can accomplish everything and find the energy to play with my boys!
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